


Choice

by bees_honey



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alpha Steve Rogers, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alpha/Omega, Friendship/Love, Howard Stark's A+ Parenting, Implied/Referenced Domestic Violence, M/M, Omega Tony Stark, Secret Identity, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-20
Updated: 2020-01-20
Packaged: 2020-01-21 17:51:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 20
Words: 19,384
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18529240
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bees_honey/pseuds/bees_honey
Summary: What happens when a choice is made for Tony when he is younger which will decide his present and future.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> If I need to tag anything more - just give me a heads up. I am bad at tagging.

Tony reaches up and touches his brow where he had been punched and pulls away his hand. It is warm, wet and bright red. _Well, shit._ he thinks, _I am totally going to be blamed for this one._ Gently he presses the wound, attempting to examine how injured he is. The pain goes deep. _This is bad, really-really bad._ his mind hums, _Howard was going to kill me._

Christ Tony can already hear the angry tone, “This is your third fight this semester. Did you even make it to class this morning before fighting the nearest Alpha you could find? Don’t you want to be a respectable Omega? I can only pay for so many wings and libraries to keep you in school. Do you think they even want you there? The administration is angry enough at having a presented Omega in classes with Alphas, but one that fights Alphas?”

Tony gingerly begins to stand up, weighing his injuries. The school Alphas love pushing him so he falls forward and looks like a presenting Omega. They crow, jeer and call him an hungry slut. The group tried it again today but Tony was ready to fight. Much of it was a blur of red anger but at one point Tony had spun, roundhouse kicked and landed on his side. But that was a solid minute ago. Now it was time to get back up.

Little by little he shifts his center, seeing if his leg can support him. It can, barely, but enough. Tony starts to walk toward the school nurse's office, leaving two Alphas whining on the floor, the other three had fled. He may be in the worst trouble of his life, but he had undeniably won the fight.

Slowly, steadily, and completely alone he arrives at the nurse’s office. She moves urgently to the phone calling the hospital, his parents, and the principal. Her nasal voice describing the mess of an Omega that was before her. Her tone on the phone is rushed but her actions belie her true lack of empathy. She does not try to apply so much as a bandaid to Tony until she puts down the receiver after the third call. At last she comes over to look over his injuries.

 _She hates me._ He thinks to himself, _The only other Omega at this school and she can’t stand the sight of me. No one here can._  In the distance he hears the siren coming. _At least I’ll win._  Tony smiles to himself, _I graduate in three months. I’ll make it. I’ll go to MIT this fall. I’ll win. If Howard lets me._  
____

It is five stitches, and a knee brace. Tony’s Mother sits in silence the entire time. She looks forward, no doubt lost in her sorrow. Whatever she is thinking she keeps it to herself. Allowing her son’s imagination to spiral into negativity and destruction. _No doubt she is wondering what is wrong with me. Why am I is uppity not demur, sarcastic not silent, and angry not compliant. She loves me but she can’t understand me. She must think I’m like Howard. An Omega Howard._  For the first time today Tony’s eyes begin to water. The doctor walks in angry, obviously with his panties in a bunch.

There is going to be an investigation, the doctor informs them, child protective services is involved... again. Tony smiles now he gets to hear people try and convince his Howard how to raise his son. That is always a calm conversation. Though, perhaps it is because of people telling Howard not to allow Tony to go to school that makes Howard force Tony down the administration’s throat. “We’ll make them choke on you Anthony.” Howard had once said. “They will try to eat alive but we’ll make ‘em choke.” God he hates Howard.

After the Doctor is through degrading his mother and his absent father the pair is free to go. Tony coolly gets into the car and tries to not think. But that is his curse, he always thinks. School is a right that can be taken away whenever Howard wanted. Tony knows this. Knows it in his soul. He needs to be best, every time he raised his hand in class he must be right, and for every test he is has to throw off the curve. He is obligated to be top of every class and therefore hated by every classmate. How can he not be? He has skipped four years so far and is a 13 year old senior in a prestigious Alpha prep school. Howard’s Alma Mater, Pleasant Mount, and Tony is going to graduate from there, even if Howard has to fistfight the Dean for the diploma.

The car stops and Tony wakes from his thoughts. The light is on in Howard’s study. “Go see your father Tony.” His mother’s voice is soft, exhausted. She will not help him today. Distantly Tony wonders if she even can anymore.He gets out quickly and doesn’t turn back, that would show weakness, and Stark men are made of iron.  
____

Tony strides with false confidence to the door of the study on a busted leg. He feels the need to show this self-assured stitched up face to the empty halls. After all what if a servant sees? Stark men, even the Omegas, are not cowards. They don’t fear the unknown, “Strong, Stead, Iron” Tony repeats to himself. It is only when he reaches for the handle that he stills for a moment. _Deep breath, courage._

“Jesus Christ Tony, I can smell you from here.” Howard yells through the door, “No wonder they attacked you.” A cold anger fills Tony and he brashly opens the door and walks midway into the room. His back straight, his stance recalcitrant.

Howard growls at the Omega’s attitude. He begins to walk towards Tony who squares his shoulder defiantly and prepares for the blows. Howard, however, pivots at the last second and goes to the counter to Tony’s right. On dark wood counter top is a syringe filled with a yellow liquid. Howard picks it up and strides over to Tony. Howard is a head taller, and uses it, leaning over his son.

“This is top secret.” he hits each word with a hard emphasis. “It will protect you. It will keep the Alphas off of you.” He rolls up Tony’s sleeve. “No one can know about this, Tony. No one. Not your mother, your teachers, your classmates or anyone else you might trust. When it comes to this your trust no one.” There is a long pause. It takes a moment for Tony to realize that Howard was waiting for a response.

 _Something is wrong,_ Tony’s mind screams. He licks his lips, fear overtakes him, his skin is cold, his stomach drops, he should run. Everything in him tells him to run, but he doesn’t. Instead he faces his father and looks him in the eyes. Something has changed there, behind his father’s eyes. “I won’t.” he says timidly.

“I mean it.” Howard's voice is a hard slap.

“I swear Dad.” Tony forces with all the conviction he can summon.

“Good.” Howard’s voice is still hard, somber, and surprising sober. “This will hurt.”

Dear God did it ever.

\----


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta anyone?

Tony is in love with ROTC student James Rhodes. The deep mushy, you complete me, you make me want to be a better man, you had me at hello, bullshit RomCom love. He hates it. He hates blushing, he hates his heart racing, he hates his dorky laugh that flows so easily when Rhodey is in the room. But here he is in love and for some horrible reason he enjoys it. Last week when Rhodey’s hand fell on his shoulder because Tony had made him laugh hysterically. Rhodey literary needed to steady himself from giggling, because of something Tony said. Tony will honor that feeling of warmth for the rest of his life. 

Tony is 18, about to graduate with three PhDs (Robotics, Engineering and Bio-chem) from MIT. He is going to lead Howard’s company and bring it to levels of awesome that are near unfathomable to that fucking board. He is going to change the whole damn world and he wants Rhodey and the easy warmth of actual love to be there with him. 

Tony has been laying the groundwork as best he can, sure he is charming, and precocious, but can he be loveable? Something worthy of love. Tony is not sure. He has nightmares, bad ones, wakes up screaming. There is no denying his selfishness, he can get distracted for hours on a puzzle, a problem, a pattern of thought. What about his neediness? These thoughts and more cloud Tony’s mind. But then he sees Rhodes and it all goes away. 

One Spring morning, he wakes up and thinks, today. They are both two months from graduating, Rhodes would be going on to serve. Tony has to make himself and his feelings known now. It should be easy, after all, Rhodes must feel it too. He smiles happily when Tony enters the room, he stands up for Tony, find different reasons to touch a hand, a knee, and a shoulder- let us not forget the shoulder.

So he heads out to Rhodes apartment with a dozen red roses, and a whole bunch of nerves. The apartment is in the middle of several campus housing complexes. It is a small apartment, but Rhodey doesn’t have any roommates. Which is a great thing because, well, it just is. Tony takes a breath, “Strong, Steady, Iron.” he thinks and he rings the bell. Three, two, one. Rhodes answers with a wide and easy smile. 

“Tony,” Rhode’s voice is chipper, “Come on in. I’m making coffee.”

“Seems like perfect timing on my part.”

“What brings you around?”

Tony pauses, looking at the roses, his courage falters a moment, but he pushes forward, “Well, I had to show these flowers how handsome you are.” 

Rhodes laughs and Tony beams. This one-sided flirting is an inside joke at this point. 

“Seriously though, what’s with the flowers?” Rhodes asks.

“You.” Tony’s throat seems oddly tight. “I want to talk.”

Rhodes eyes widen, “Let me stop you there. Tony, if you want to talk about this you have have to really talk about it. Tell me about your Alpha.”

“What Alpha?”

“Come on Tony, it is weak but you still smell like him. If you even want to start a conversation about us we have got to talk about them.”

“There is no them, there is no other Alpha. I want you- you to be my Alpha.”

“Tony, it is okay, just tell me. I won’t judge you. Sometimes bonding doesn’t work out and if they hurt you, we will hurt them. It is painful but we can fix it a bad bonding. But,” Rhodes swallows, “I need to know.”

“There is nothing to know. I don’t have an Alpha. I’ve never had an Alpha.”

“I can smell them!,” Rhodes voice slowly gains volume “All the time, everytime you lean in. It is impossible not to smell it!” .

“There is no Alpha!” Tony shouts back, he is confused, and enraged. 

Rhodes takes a step back and hold up his hands. “Okay. Okay. We won’t talk about it right now. But the other half of the conversation is on hold too. Okay.”

“No, it is not okay. I don’t have an Alpha, I never had, Rhodey I swear, I swear on my Mother.”

Rhodey’s body stiffens at that, he realizes that Tony would never lie on the memory of his mother, Howard sure, fuck that guy, but not Maria. In her death Maria became a saint in Tony’s mind. Deified beyond reproach. She was a martyr to Howard’s whims, abuse and dehumanizing Alpha views. Maria was golden and untouchable. 

“Tony honestly didn’t know he was bonded. Well shit,” Rhodey thinks and looks hard at Tony’s face. It is open earnest, and though the Omega would never never admit to it, a picture of fear. 

“Tony,” Rhodes starts and then drops his sentence. A long silence forms and with it brings a gap between the two men that hadn’t existed before. A shadow now stands between them. Rhodes could feel his heart breaking, without the both parties a bond could not be broken without damn near killing the Omega.

“Tony, I believe you. But you have an Alpha. Everyone thinks you do. I mean, we can all smell it. We know you have an Alpha.” Tony’s eyes are slowly filling, he rubs them, not giving them the chance to fall. “Hell,” Rhodes continues, “I’ve been yelled at for honing in on someone else’s territory.” Tony bristles at that. “I know, don’t worry, I punched the Alpha who said it. But you are bonded Tony, and before anything can happen between us. I mean you know it is impossible and dangerous and, and you can die.” Rhodes voice is high and tight, he tries unsuccessfully to clear his throat. “We need to find out what happened, we need to find your Alpha.”

“No,” growls Tony, “If what you say is true we need to find a knothead who is about to get his canines removed.”


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3 

Tony gets tested right away, and yes he is bonded. Strongly bonded to some random Alpha. All of the doctors agree, having Rhodes try to override the bond would lead to a violent Sickness and a slim chance of survival. The gap which had been born that day grows after that. 

There is still hope, yes Tony is marked with a stranger’s DNA but that means the stranger can be found. Tony hires a private investigator, hacks genealogy sites, police DNA banks, federal government logs, military records and any institutions studying DNA. No matches come through. The gap grows. 

Rhodes leaves to serve and Tony takes care of the business. The gap grows.

They call each other, often at first, then less and less. The gap grows.

A year passes. A year of frustration. A year of loneliness. The gap becomes unbearable.

Finally, Tony calls Rhodey to say goodbye. 

“Tony, I’m on leave another week.” Rhodey responds.

“It is not that kind of goodbye.”

“Oh.” Rhodes sounds sad and resigned, “Okay Tony. I… I’m sorry Tony.”

“Me too.”

Tony turns 20.

He hardly sees anyone he cares about. Every passing moment is spent on R&D. The board wants Tony gone. The only reason he survives the 1st board meeting is because he comes in swinging. His plans for a new kind of radar technology are genius. 

The board raves, “It is amazing, the stuff of science fiction, it accomplishes the impossible.” But he can see their true feelings in their eyes, “An Omega running a company? The scandal, the disgrace. How dare Howard leave them with this little shit.” He has to fight them with everything he has. 

Every ounce of brain power goes to work: weapons, energy sources, tablets, micro robotics and when the loneliness overwhelms he parties. At first he is referred to as Omega Stark but as the year progresses he becomes Tony Stark, and then to some just Tony. Stocks fluctuate and then soar. He becomes both famous and infamous. His achievements show up in tech magazines, newspapers and his blunders in tabloids and blog posts. At first people gawk and demand to know who his Alpha is and why they would let their Omega do such things. Then they ask if his Alpha is proud of his achievements. At the end of the year they whisper behind his back of a missing Alpha who can not live up to Tony and lives disgraced in the shadows. 

Tony turns 21. 

The party is massive. The board rents out The Mark, nightclub extraordinaire, to honor their beloved wunderkind. They no longer try to oust him from the company, he is too valuable. According to Obie he is the company. Obie’s the best. They laugh together after R&D meetings. Obie is his closest ally and adviser, his hand in this event is evident everywhere. 

The entire venue is decorated to the nines, the booze flows freely and everyone who attends is throwing themselves at Tony. Some are looking for approval, some funding, but most are looking for sex. Tony loves it, at first, but as the evening progresses he starts to realize that most of these people, damn near every guest, is unknown to him. Actors from his favorite movies, influencers he mocks regularly, and the affluent families he never liked. It suddenly seems hollow.

It is around 3 am and the party has grown immensely. The crowd overflows onto the street, refusing to be quelled by the law. Everyone is pressing closer, Tony begins to feel an unfamiliar pressure on his chest. It grows steadily and by 3:30 he is having trouble getting in air. He is sweating horribly. He needs to get out. Pushing aside yet another horny Beta he head to the stairs. First he walks casually but by the end he is running. 

Tony darts to the stairs and dashes to the rooftop. Safe from the crowd he gulps in large breaths of air. He breathes in too much too fast, gags, and has to sit down on the tar top. He has had too much to drink, his head is fuzzy. He misses Rhodey. He hates his Alpha, whoever the fuck that person is. He is so pathetic, and so alone that only his co-worker thought to plan him a party.

In this moment he is lost. He imagines his deserved present, what was to be his present with Rhodey. Not this giant affair of cling-ons but a small group of close friends. Not gallons of alcohol but a bottle of wine. Not an entire club but a small brownstone. 

“Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ.” He whispers as a wave of panic rolls over him. He wants to cry but shakes it off. He is a Stark. He is a man of action and all the shit that goes along with it. An idea forms.

He carefully goes down the fire escape and dodges the crowd huddling at the entrance side of the building. He runs, fast and far. Ten blocks away is his office building and the closest computer capable of doing what he wants. 

A quick rework of the security system at R&D lets Tony inside without being seen. No one can see this. No one can see the state he is in and the task he is about to do. His blood feels like hot motor oil, pumping through his body and leaving him hot beyond belief. Yet, he still runs up the five flights of stairs to his office. 

Sitting in his dark office, breathing heavily he sets to work. An hour and several illegal deeds done he hacks the last DNA database he can think of- SHIELD. The agency that had visited him a month ago about the old Captain America shield Howard has designed. Tony had handed it over with little ceremony. Let people who want the past, have the past. But something had seemed so odd. He had dismissed it, but now here he was breaking into their encrypted networks and forcing his way to all of their secrets. 

Another hour passes slowly and gruelingly he is tired, still drunk and emotional. This is not Tony’s best work, and there are consequences for it. His hack is detected and the screen goes black. “Shit.” he curses, “Fuck, shit, shit!” 

He can’t deal with this right now. He turns and flees back to his apartment. It is a twenty minute Uber car ride. He curses himself the entire way. 

When he gets back to the high rise he is exhausted and drunk enough that it takes him a minute to realize that the elevator is stopped at his floor. He stumbles towards his apartment but a smell makes him halt. 

A small whiff of Alpha caught on a breeze, smelling of metal and cloves. He moves closer lured by a sense of safety. A warmth he hasn’t felt in two years begins to fill Tony. The sensation sobers him slightly. He inhales deeply trying to suss out the scent, it is coming from his apartment. 

Panic fills every inch of his being. The scent matches his own, a second half, a missing part of the equation. “Oh God,” He thinks, he begins trembling, “Please, not now, not tonight. Not him.” The smell has become cloying, it hangs off of him, surrounding, attacking. 

The trembling has morphed into body wrecking shakes. Something is wrong, terribly wrong. He turns to flee down the hall but collapses before he can make it back to the elevator. 

He can’t open his eyes but he hears a shuffle and then there are hands upon him, checking his pulse, feeling his forehead, and placing gentle hands on his chest checking for breathing. He can hear a steady voice calling out to God, pleading.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a Beta!! Thank you LadyUkkey.

Tony feels himself being lifted up and carried, but try as he might he can’t open his eyes or move his mouth. None of his limbs are responding though he can feel everything, the brush of fabric against his skin, the thud of pressure against someone’s chest, the slight huff of breath against his head . The voice from before has been joined by others and his brain is having trouble figuring out how many people there are. After several seconds he is placed on a carpet.

A low male voice is barking orders, demanding action, a S.H.I.E.L.D Medic, a drip, and detox shot.

 _Oh, God_ , thinks Tony, _A detox shot, that will hurt so much._

A deep female voice is calm and steady, “Captain, We had no idea this is why he broke into the system. We would have never had this happen this way. Can you hear me? Captain?”

A nasally voice overhead, “This is not good. He is turning white. Lean him on his side, he’ll start vomiting soon.” Careful hands turn Tony on his side. He hates this, he can not move and is unable to stop them from touching him. He hurts so much.

A constant voice, soft and pained is repeating prayers from Tony’s childhood.

Time stretches on and Tony can feel his stomach contracting. Without being able to control it he vomits up everything in his stomach, and then retches up everything from the day before too.

“That’s it Stark,” the nasally voice encourages, “Let it all out kid. I’ll grab a blanket, his body will start sweating out the suppressants soon.” Tony hears a set of footsteps walking away.

Tony feels like he has been pumped full of venom, his entire body is now embroiled in a fight against his suppressants.

“Captain,” the female voice soothes, “Captain he is going to be okay. This happens now, but we have treatments. Captain, Captain.” a long pause, “Your Omega is okay but you need to stay with us. Steve, please.”

The fourth voice stops praying. “Anthony. Fury said his name was Anthony.”

“Anthony,” the woman corrects, “Anthony will be okay. He has Sickness, It happens sometimes.”

The footsteps come back and a soft blanket is settles upon his prone form. If he could Tony would be screaming right now.

“Should we move him to his bed?” Steve asks.

“No,” says the blanket bringer, “I started to run a bath. We may have to put him in cold water to keep down a fever.”

“Of course,” Steve sounds broken, “I’ve never … I have never been around this before.”

Tears form on Tony’s face, _Fuck you,_ he thinks darkly, _You did this to me, you don’t get to be sad. You are my suffering incarnate._ Then he blacks out from the pain.


	5. Chapter 5

Gradually and painfully, Tony wakes up. 

 

Before he opens his eyes he realizes someone is holding his hand. The scent registers as a match to his own, in a way no other can, it is the scent of his Alpha,  _ his _ ... All Tony needs to do is open his eyes and he will meet the bastard.  _ Get ready for the verbal thrashing of your life, _ he thinks. Slowly moving his tongue in his mouth, it feels dry and he doubts he will be able to speak much.  

 

Suddenly, something cool is at his lips “It is an ice chip. It should help.” the voice is kind and eager.

 

Tony opens his eyes in shock, not expecting the kindness. There, before him, is an adonis with blond hair and concern written across his face. “Anthony, can you hear me?” asks the Alpha, as he reaches out his hand and brushes Tony’s forehead. “Your fever is going down,” the hand moves to Tony’s neck and checks his pulse, “Your heart rate is better too,” Tony tries and fails to move away from the hand invading his space but finds himself too weak. He closes his eyes in disgust. 

 

“Anthony?” His Alpha implores and then calls out, “Bruce? I think he is coming around.” 

 

Tony hears footsteps and then a gentle  voice asks, “What happened?”

 

His Alpha was direct, no flowering of the short interaction, “He opened his eyes and ate some ice chips.” 

 

“Alright let’s see,” Again Tony felt a hand upon his forehead, then check his pulse, finally it rests on his chest feeling his chest rise and fall, “Anthony, can you hear me?” The stranger leans close, close enough for Tony to smell him, a Beta.

 

_ Maybe, just maybe, he’ll help. _ Tony’s is mind whirls wondering what to say.  _ Save me, I don’t want this.  _ He licks his dry lips and opens his mouth, only for another ice chip to be placed inside. 

 

He opens his eyes again. The Beta, Bruce, is medium height with a mop of black curls sprouting from his head, “Hey Anthony, I’m Doctor Banner. I’ve been taking care of you. Do you know where you currently are?”

 

“Home,” Tony’s voice is a horse whisper, he needs to be alone in the room with Bruce. “Water?” He requests softly, looking pointedly at the Alpha. 

 

“Of course, I’ll go grab you some.” Bruce says happily and leaves the room. 

 

_ Way to take a hint Bruce, _ Tony thinks,fuming. Now he is left once again alone with his Alpha, who looks at him with a calculating expression.

 

“Anthony? Do you know my name?” His Alpha asks.

 

Rather than try to speak again Tony simply shakes his head  _ no _ . 

 

The Alpha nods, as though Tony’s reaction confirmed something, “I’m Steve Rodgers. Do you know me?” 

 

_ So this is Steve, the one who prayed for me _ . Tony’s mind was starting to catch up. 

 

Tony shakes his head no, the name ‘Steve Rogers’ means nothing to him. 

 

“Is your father Howard Stark?”

 

Tony bristles at that, like his Alpha, Steve didn’t already know that. How else could Howard have gotten enough of the Alpha’s DNA to force a bond. Steve must have provided it, or been in a coma. The bonding hormone extraction would have been painful. After a pause Tony nods a yes and gestures to the cup full of ice chips. Steve quickly grabs a chip and goes to feed it to Tony, who accepts reluctantly after a beat.

 

“I knew your father,” Steve  moves his mouth like he wants to say more but nothing comes out.

 

Tony’s eyes narrow, suspicions confirmed, Steve was involved in this hellish nightmare. If he were capable of talking right now he would call Steve out on it, but as it is, his tongue is sticking to the roof of his mouth. Luckily, Bruce comes back into the room with the water. Tony tries to reach for the cup but finds that his hands and arms are too heavy to lift. He stares at them in disbelief at his body’s betrayal. Steve reaches for the cup and brings it to Tony’s lips. Tony tips his head back so he can slowly sip. 

 

It takes a while but Tony finally felt like he could speak. He breathes in deeply imagining himself to be like a dragon, but instead of fire his ire will come spewing out.  __ “How-” His voice croaks and he is terrified to find he can’t say more right now. Steve again brings the water to Tony.

 

“We don’t know,” Steve says as Tony drinks, “We have theories but no one knows for sure how.” 

 

Tony tries again but he opens his mouth to no avail, almost gaping like a fish. His eyes sting and he thanks god that he was probably too dehydrated to cry. Steve sees the effort and looks towards Bruce for answers. 

 

“Maybe you should rest Anthony.”  Bruce looks to Steve, “Call me back in if anything changes,” He then leaves the room. 

 

“Don’t worry Anthony, I won’t leave your side,” Steve promises, the look in his eyes honest and pure. 

 

_ Hey, got to keep track of your property right _ , Tony thinks bitterly before going back to sleep. 

 

\-----

 

Tony can feel himself waking up again and this time immediately tests is hand and arm strength. He finds he can move, at least enough to text. Before he can even open his eyes he croaks out, “Phone.” and then opens his eyes.

 

“Anthony?” Steve asks.

 

“Phone,” Tony rasps again staring at him blankly. 

 

“Of course,” Steve smiles at him, as if pleased to be able to do anything for Tony, even if it is just giving him a phone. 

 

Tony glaces at the screen as soon as it is within his grasp. His birthday was three days ago. Three days he has been in this room, sick out of his mind. The amount text messages and voicemails are numerous, but he doesn’t try to read any of them. Instead he immediately composes a text to Obie:  _ My Alpha found me.  _

 

He stares at Steve again weighing out what may happen next before hitting send. He then settles in to wait peacefully for Obie to get here with the lawyer and doctors. After all they were trained for this. 


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bad news for Tony

Tony leans back onto his bed, all he needs to do is wait. 

Obie, the doctor and the lawyer will be there soon. A sense of calm descends on Tony, it is as though he has clenched his fist for years and just now let go. He is going to get what he wants - a nice life with Rhodey. Sure Rhodes has been dating a new Omega for about three months but once he finds out that Tony is available, well, Tony feels sorry for the Omega. Him and Rhodes are meant to be. A smile plays on his lips and he is happy.

“Anthony, are you feeling better?” Steve asks him. Tony looks to see that Steve is smiling as well. 

Poor fool, you have no idea.

Suddenly the silence in the other room of the apartment ends. Loud yet still muffled voices can be heard. The volume raises until it becomes impossible to ignore. Tony pushes himself up on his pillow, poised and ready. More voices join in and it becomes clear that there are many people in a heated argument. 

Steve leans forward in his seat, an indescribable expression on his face and asks, “Do you want to hear what they are saying?”

Tony startles at the request before nodding yes. 

With that Steve gets up from his chair and opens the door with a sigh. “Hey, if you want to discuss our future, perhaps you should all do it in here,” He then steps aside from the doorway and waves his hand inviting everyone in. 

A small crowd enters, some looking guilty (Steve’s side) others beaming cockily (Tony’s side). Bruce is one of the people who enters and walks over to where Steve is standing along with a tall red headed woman, a blond man wearing the ugliest shade of purple on the planet, and an older black man with an eye patch. Heading to his side Tony recognizes his OBGYN, Dr. Taylor and his Lawyer, Mr. Avion Esq. and beams happily at them both. They are going to save me he thinks happily, it is almost over. Obie stands closest to Tony and starts to talk, “So let’s start talking about bond breaking.”

“What?” Bruce gasps his head snapping up. 

“We break the bond, these two happy kids go their separate ways. The ownership of Stark Industries is never questioned and we don’t bring up legal charges of forced bonding on a minor,” Obie smiles widely. It is his patented move: say something they don’t want, threaten what will happen if they don’t do it and then pretend it was all charming. The move was simple and had lead to five buyouts, this year alone. 

The blond male laughs and then covers his mouth to try and hide it. Obie’s smile falters.

“We can’t do…” Bruce shakes his head, “You can’t… I’m sorry I have to go. Look at the tests. Just… I … Bye,” and with that ever so eloquent goodbye Bruce leaves the room clearly frustrated.

That was odd, but one down. Tony thinks. 

“What Doctor Banner was trying to say,” Eye-patch drawls, “Is that breaking the bond is an impossibility at the moment. Despite opposition,” he gestures to Steve, “We looked into nullifying the bond and it is simply too strong. We could do it, but it will kill Stark.” 

Tony can feel all the blood drain from his face and he begins to feel dizzy, That can’t be true. 

“You’ll have to excuse me when I say, I don’t believe a god damn word you just said,” Obie all but growls. 

“Language!” Steve hisses.

The eye patch man shrugs and again the blond man tries not to laugh. Tony is having trouble focusing on it all, what with his life falling apart. 

“And what is so fucking funny?” Obie yells.

The blond man sobers himself, barely, and says, “The irony of it all. You think we are after your omega for the Stark Industries and want us to break it off. We thought you were after our alpha for the Military contracts and want you to break it off. But we are both wrong, unless it is an act?” He looks over Tony’s doctor and lawyer, “It would be one hell of a good act.” 

Silently, Tony tries to gather himself mentally repeating. Iron, Stark men are made of Iron.

“What contract?” Obie asks pulling back on his angry tone.

“The one you submitted to SHIELD, five days ago,” Eye-patch says pointedly, “Two days later this omega hacks into our system and we come to find out that he is bonded to one of our top agents. Now doesn’t that sound a little suspicious to you?” 

Obie give a haughty chuckle, “This kid has been looking for his no good alpha for years. Said alpha then shows up on his 21st birthday. The exact day that Tony’s trust kicks in, when Tony gains control over Stark Industries. Unless of course he is bonded to an alpha. Then it all goes to the alpha. How is that for a little fucking suspicious?” Obie puts his hands on his hips jutting himself into Eye-patch’s personal space. 

Tony’s mind was reeling He’ll own it all, the company, the patents, the trust... me. 

“Anthony? Are you okay?” Steve pushes himself between the Obie and Eye-patch and sits by Tony’s side on the bed, “This is too much for him right now, everyone out. Anthony needs his rest.”

“Tony,” Obie sneers, “The kid, likes to be called Tony.” 

“Out,” Steve commands.

A silence fills the room as Obie tries to stare down Steve, he can’t. Soon everyone starts to shuffle to the door, “Don’t worry Tony, we will get it all sorted. This isn’t over,” Obie calls over his shoulder and shuts the door. 

Again Tony is alone with Steve.

“Tony, I am so sorry...” Steve's words are halted by a wilting look from Tony. 

“You knew,” Tony’s words are flat, “You knew when they came in that the bond couldn’t be broken and you let me find out that way.”

Steve looks at Tony with stern expression,“I did not call them,” but then his face and tone softens, “And I am not in the habit of restricting what people can do, who they can see and when. I asked and you said you wanted to hear it all.”

“Please leave,”Tony is stern, wishing he could command his alpha the way he can him.

“If I leave, my scent leaves, your body goes through a withdrawal. You’ll be in extreme pain.”

“I’ll cope.”

“Tony,” Steve's voice is pleading. 

“Okay, stay, but no talking. I just can’t,”Tony turns away from Steve, he cannot look at him right now.

“Of course,” Steve’s voice is a little sad but definitive of Tony’s decision.

They both sit in silence for hours.

If either is bothered they don’t show it.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

After many hours the silence ends with Steve apologizing, “Tony, for what it’s worth, I am sorry,” 

So shocking is the sound that Tony almost feels slapped. An apology from an his alpha, never in a million years would he have anticipated such a thing.Steve continues, “I should have told you what I knew immediately. I didn’t,it left you open to being hurt and I am truly sorry for that. There are reasons I could give you but none of them are valid enough to warrant what I did. I won’t do that again.” 

“You won’t keep something from me again,” Tony clarifies.

Steve looks down and to the side before continuing, “I won’t leave you open again.”

Tony leans forward in his bed, shifting around, uncomfortable, “That isn’t the same thing.”

“No, it isn’t,” there was a sadness in Steve’s eyes.

Tony leans back against the pillows, letting out a huff of air, “Then that means nothing.”

“It is all I have to offer you,”

“No it isn’t,” Tony retorts,“You can break the bond.”

Steve’s reply is pained, “I can’t. Bruce was very clear, he has never seen a bond this strong before, it will kill you.” 

Immediately Tony replied, “Then I want to see the test results.”

“Of course. You can have them, you should, I would never stop you from having them, “Steve begins to ramble, “You-”

Tony interrupts, “And I want my doctor to give them to me.”

“Yes, absolutely. I can do that.” Steve, given a mission he can do, gets up happily and leaves the room. 

The door shuts behind him and for a blissful minutes Tony is happily alone. After enjoying peace for a few moments he reaches over the bedside table to grab his phone. He needs to connect to the outside world, get out of his own head and away from whatever this is. 

He sees well over 100 texts, emails, and posts that have to be read. Slowly he scans through them, most are birthday wishes from people who he frankly, doesn’t give a shit about or know. He flips through until he sees one that catches his eye, it is from Rhodes. 

The text is simple; ‘All the best on your birthday, wish I could be there. But you know keeping the world safe for democracy and all that.’ 

Tony smiles at the jovial nature of the text but then frowns when he doesn’t see anything else from Rhodey. No picture, no emoji, no flirty subtext, nothing that proves there is anything more than friendship between them. 

Tony sighs and puts down the phone.

Suddenly the air feels cold in Tony’s nose. The cold turns to frigid arctic air, the kind that burns the skin. As soon as the arctic air hit his lungs Tony’s body crumbles in pain. The air is jagged in his lungs and seems to pierce him from the inside out. He lets out a raw primal scream, an omega distress call. A sound Tony had vowed to himself he would never make. 

Steve bursts into the room and covers Tony with his body, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I forgot, I am sorry.” 

Tony breaths in the scent of his alpha, and hates to find it quickly calms his insides, quelling the pain. He needs it, needs Steve not to feel the insurmountable agony. 

The fact that he is dependent on someone else, a stranger, and alpha, breaks him. 

Soon his mouth is spewing, “I hate you! I hate you! I don’t want you. You stupid knot headed, son of a bitch,” Every spiteful thing he had felt in the past few years came out in an uncontrollable litany of profane hate. 

Steve begins to let go of his hold, but Tony’s body jerks in protest, pain hitting him again like a punch to the gut. Steve then tightens his grip and doesn’t let go, as he holds the omega and rocks him apologizing through Tony’s entire rant of hate. 

It takes a while but Tony eventually runs out of words to throw at Steve. He lays limp in Steve’s grasp. Steve lowers Tony back to the bed carefully, adjusting the pillows just so. 

Tony can now see Steve’s face and is surprised to find tears there, “Your doctor is on his way with the test results. You may want them to run them again, but he will need more samples.”

For the first time Tony falters in his hatred, “Did you want this?”

“Not like this,” Steve’s voice is tight.

Tony pushes, “Then, like what?”

Steve looks away.

“You love someone else,” the thought and the words tumble out at the same time. 

“Loved,” Steve clarifies.

“You don’t want me,” Tony doesn’t know whether he should be hurt or not.

“I don’t know you yet Tony,but I want to,” taking in a breath he continues, “I want to get to know you, and I want you to be happy. This is the future - our future - mine and yours, together. It may not be what either of us wanted, but it is what it is and I want to do right by you.”

“Then do right by me,” Tony starts with more confidence than he feels, “The company is mine, the fortune is mine, my body is mine.” 

Steve nods along with every word, he takes Tony’s hands in his, “I promise you Tony, the company, the money, and yourself, are all yours.”

Ever petulant Tony goes on, “How am I supposed to believe you? All you need to do is go down the hall and I crumble. You have all the power here. I-I have nothing,” he only slightly falters at the end.

“You have my word-”

“We need rules.” 

“Rules?” 

“Legal stuff. I want it in writing. All of it, the company, the money… me.”

Steve sits down on his chair, he wipes the drying tears from his own cheeks, “I know you don’t trust me. You have no reason to.” He looks Tony directly in the eyes, “If this if what you need, you can have it.” 

“I need it. I need it.” Tony emphasizes.

Steve nods, voice calm but firm,“Call your lawyer, get him to draw up the papers. I’ll sign them today.” 

Tony reaches over to his cell phone and texts his lawyer. It takes a moment but he is able to set up a meeting. Steve sits in quiet and looks draped in gloom.

Something akin to pity pulls at Tony, he knows that look of sadness - it is the look of a future lost. He doesn’t want this either, “It could have been anyone,” Tony says before thinking.

Steve cocks his head to the side in inquiry. 

“It has nothing to do with you, as a person, it could have been any alpha. I would react the same. I’d ask for the same.”

“I know,” Steve sighs, “Can this work? Can you try not to hate me?” he sounds hopeful, just slightly.

“How can I not hate you?” Tony whispers, looking down at his hand, “You and Howard, you took away my choice.”

“What?” Steve stutters, “I would never, never, take that away from someone. I had no idea,” Steve goes on struggling to find a coherent sentence in his indignation, “I don’t even know how this happened” 

At Tony’s look of disbelief Steve continues, “I figured it had something to do with Howard, but only because it was the only connection my team and I could find. He was one of the few people that had access to my medical records, blood samples and DNA that sort of thing. But I had nothing to do with it.”

“How am I supposed to believe you?” Tony looks at him incredulously.

“I can’t tell you why, but it is impossible that I was involved. But believe me, I had nothing to do with this.” 

Tony looks down for a moment he hesitates and then he makes a choice he wouldn’t have dreamed of three days ago, or three hours ago, but something about the empty birthday wishes, the lackadaisical message from Rhodes and the cathartic nature of his outburst pushes him forward. He opens up. 

“Howard he-he told me that it would protect me. I was having problems with alphas in school. The alphas were getting mean, violent. I held my own but it was a lot, I had a really bad experience and he gave me a shot and I didn’t know any better,” Tony sits fidgeting as he explained “I-I have thought about it, over and over this past year. It had to be an experimental bonding agent mixed with someone’s- your- DNA. That is why it is so strong -strong and fake. I don’t know why I trusted him, he was a shit dad,” Tony pauses, stuck in a memory before continuing, “He said it would protect me and I just believed him.”

Steve’s face shows a brief flash of pain before taking on a look of determination, “It will protect you.”


	8. Chapter 8

The rest of the day passes slowly. Tony’s doctor comes and collects more samples but the results are the same; the bond is unnaturally strong and bond breaking of any kind would result in Tony’s death. 

After what happened when Steve left the room and took his scent with him Tony believes them. 

A dark cloud descends onto Tony, and Steve, god bless him seems intent on doing whatever he can to make Tony feel better.. Steve brings more pillows, water, ice chips and chicken soup.

Tony watches him with a curious eye and general disbelief. This guys life was just torn away from him and he is fluffing pillows. I just don’t get it. Doesn’t he care?

Later in the day Tony’s lawyer shows up with the paperwork. Steve goes to sign it without a glance, only to stop when Tony interrupts. 

“Don’t you want to look it over?” Tony asks, “She’s a good lawyer, you won’t be able to break it later.”

“I trust you,” Steve replies simply.

“You shouldn’t. You don’t know me. You don’t know me at all.” He emphatically points at the agreement.

Steve’s reply was firm, “I trust you.” 

“Can you give us a moment?” Tony asks the lawyer who quietly leaves the room.

“Steve, you can’t just sign papers without reading them. It is stupid and reckless.” Tony stresses the last sentence.

“Tony, I don’t care. If this is what you need. Which you said it is. I am going to sign it regardless. I can read it afterwards,” Steve reasons.

“Don’t sign away your rights!” Tony admonishes.

Steve turns around and walks toward the bedroom window. He looks outside for a long while. While Tony can’t see through the window from his bed, he can see the effect it has on Steve. He looks sad, and impossibly alone. What the fuck happened to this guy? Tony thinks.

Steve takes a deep breath and turns away, “Your rights are gone Tony. You didn’t get to look over the paperwork for them to be taken away from you. This paper, from what I understand, can give the rights back to you. Your right to financial autonomy, your right to control your business and your right to your body. I am going to sign those papers. But you are right, I should look them over.” 

He pauses, letting out a breath, “Not because anything in there could prevent me from signing but because you should know that I’m taking this seriously, and that I will know the rules.” Steve ends his speech and unconsciously shifts into parade rest. Tony takes in the stance and a few puzzle pieces fall into place.

This isn’t the first time Steve has signed away his life for others, or rather another in this case. Something burns in the back of Tony’s eyes.

“Call her back then,” Tony waves hand in the air and smiles briefly. It feels good. 

___

After the paperwork is read, understood and signed Tony and Steve once again find themselves alone. But something has shifted, at least for Tony, “I’m willing to give it a go,” He exclaims suddenly when Steve brings him more soup. 

“Oh?” Steve gives an unsure smile.

“Yeah,” Tony continues, “I don’t know if it is your kindness, good looks, or the fact that I have no choice but I’d like to see what we can do. I’ve been wallowing for three days, and I don’t wallow lightly.” He gives Steve a hard look, “Time to move on. New attitude - new me. Or old me but with you. You’ll like old me. You haven’t met him what with the extreme illness and,” he pauses not really knowing what to say, “Stuff, but he is a sarcastic, billionaire and a genius. He is not for everyone but he has his charms.” Tony grins his million watt grin and looks at Steve who seems frozen by Tony’s speech. 

Steve melts and laughs, “He sounds great, when do I get to meet him? Is he single?” 

“You can meet him tomorrow morning. As for single-he is married to his work, but there is this cheeky side piece, a hot blond” Tony pauses waiting to see Steve’s reaction. He hates that he has to test the waters so to speak but he needs to know the limit of Steve’s joking meter. 

“Sounds great. I’d love to meet him but I am going away.” Tony’s eyes widen in shock.   
Steve smiles widely, “See, I have an old me too. He is coming to replace me tomorrow morning. You’ll get a kick out of him. Unfortunately he is also married to his work, but when he isn’t doing that he is an artist. Not a great one, not even a good one. But he draws, and he is learning to cook. Which all his friends hate because he is horrible at it. But one day he’ll be great at it and everyone will actual enjoy his food and they will stop spitting it into their napkins.” 

Tony looks at Steve in wonder, and speaks warmly, “I’m going to go to sleep, I look forward to those guys meeting tomorrow. Seems like they have a shot.”

“Yeah, Goodnight Tony.” Steve goes to his chair ready to spend yet another few hours in an uncomfortable, modernist vision of upholstered art. 

Tony takes in Steve, as his muscles seem to have to fold and contort to fit in the chair. The omega takes a breath and says the unthinkable, “My bed is a California King. Two of you can lie down on the bed and still not touch me. Get in.”

“Are you sure?” Steve looks unsure.

Tony gestures to the space, “Absolutely, I’m uncomfortable just looking at you. It isn’t like I haven’t shared a bed with a strange alpha before.” Tony again testing the waters.

“I normally wouldn’t,” Steve clarifies as he moves to the other side of the bed, “But it has been about four days and this chair is worse than my army cot.” He lies on top of the covers putting his arms stiffly next to him. Obviously intent on not making Tony uncomfortable by being touched at all. The comment on other alphas completely ignored, or rather heard but not cared about. 

“Goodnight Steve,” Tony smirks into his pillow.

“Goodnight.”


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They meet, breakfast and then go to work... how domestic.

Chapter 9

Tony wakes up quickly the next morning as the sun filters into his bedroom window. His body finally seems up to movement, and it no longer seems like a huge effort to keep his eyes open. He looks over to the side of the bed where Steve still sleeps. Steve’s posture is rigid, his fists are clenched and his muscles are tense. His eyes move rapidly behind his lids. Clearly Steve is having a nightmare and it seems to be a bad one at that. 

“Steve?” Tony calls from his side of the bed. 

Gasping Steve bolts up. He takes a moment to take in his surroundings, and then looks over at Tony. Awkwardly Steve scratches the back of his head, “Good morning. Did you sleep well?”

“Like the dead,” Tony smiles a little, “You?”

Steve shrugs and rolls off of the bed. He takes a deep breath and straightens his back, smiling a million watt smile, “So, you haven’t met me before but my name is Steve, and I would love to make you breakfast.” 

I guess we won’t be addressing the nightmare, Tony thinks, “You don’t know me,” Tony tries, turning on his charm, “But I would love to eat something that isn’t soup.”

A loud raucous laugh erupts from Steve, “Pancakes?”

“Pancakes,” Tony echoes happily moving to the edge of his bed. He tentatively puts some weight on his legs before standing up properly. He sways a little and a moment of uncertainty fills him, until he feels Steve’s steadying hand on his back. 

Steve’s hand doesn’t leave his back until he sits at his kitchen table.

Tony begins to ask the question that has been bugging him, “who knows what happened to me?”, Does Rhodes know?

Steve begins to putter around the kitchen, picking out bowls and finding ingredients as he answers, “No one really. We were able to keep you home through the whole thing thanks to Bruce. So only a few people really.” 

Steve at this point emptied half the refrigerator onto the kitchen counter looking for something. It takes Tony a moment to realize that someone must have gone out to buy food at one point. The knowledge triggers a small amount of indigence. The idea that someone went through his cupboards and found it lacking. But he purposely chooses to let the anger go. We are starting fresh he reminds himself. 

“It has been a while since I have cooked for someone else. Even then I wasn't good at it. But I’ll try my best… Do you have lard?”

“Lard? No Ramsey only butter. At least I think.” Tony tightens his face trying to remember, “whoever did the shopping probably got some.” Tony answers back in his most passive aggressive tone. 

“Maybe,” Steve says, “Obadiah sent over the groceries with your personal assistant, Pepper.” 

“Ah,” So it was my side who did that. Tony mentally recollects his feelings. No wait, there aren’t sides. 

“Yeah,” Steve continues, “She seems really nice. She did leave some paperwork for you. But you were recovering…” He pauses, trying to see if he made the right call by not giving Tony the paperwork while he could barely move his hand.

Tony however laughs, “They’re always trying to give me that. In the office, at work functions, mailed to my home, dropped off on my vacation. I think that is the same pile of paperwork from two years ago. It just keeps growing.”

“We got a lot of it too, in the army, seems you can’t whistle unless a General writes it in triplicate,” Steve smiles, though it seems a little tight. 

Tony tilts his head, definitely a serviceman, bitter. He then remembers the clear sign of nightmares he woke up next to, PTSD? He takes few minutes to watch Steve cook and boy It is hard to watch. There is batter everywhere, and a slight smell of burning, even though there is nothing in the griddle. The first two cakes go into the trash. 

“Here they are!” Steve shyly places some utterly destroyed pancakes before Tony, “We can also order in?” he adds sadly.

“Nah,” Tony shoves a bite into his mouth, “It tastes fine. We just need to get you practice on the spatula,” Tony halts in his eating, Shit shit shit. Did he go too far? Remember he is an unknown alpha. You can’t sass him like you did Rhodey. He could hit. 

“Thanks!” Steve serves himself and begins to shovel food in his mouth at an alarming speed, Tony looks on in amazement before catching himself. 

“So going back to the paperwork, I need to go to the lab today.” At Tony’s words Steve slows down in his record breaking pancake eating. 

“Are you sure you can handle that today?” Steve asks delicately. 

“I’m sure that I am missing deadlines. Also, I have this crazy cool idea that I just need to write down the basics for before they are out of my head.”

“It may be hard to handle going back to work so quickly.” Steve is concerned.

“I don’t really have a choice, it’s my company. I need to be there; I am their top engineer, their majority shareholder, and office flirt.” Again Tony freezes. Why can’t I just watch my mouth for one day. 

“Could you do a half day? See how you feel?” again showing his concerned. 

“This is my choice, and I choose to go in to work today.” Tony states firmly. 

Steve nods looking a little sad, “Okay, I can do that.”

Tony’s eyebrows dart up in confusion “You? You can do what?”

“Accompany you to work.”

A little offended Tony frowns, “Excuse me?”

Steve sighs, “You have to be in the same room as me, remember?” 

“Oh, right, crap,” Tony looks down, “anyway we can fix that?”

Steve shakes his head, “Time. At first if I wasn’t holding your hand you would scream. Then I could just be next to you, then in the same room. Soon the same apartment? I don’t know.”

Tony huffs, “Well, these pancakes were; A for effort, but we should get going.”

“Sure, we’ll break camp in ten?”

“Sure thing Lieutenant.” Tony replies cheekily. 

“Captain,” Steve deadpans.

“Captain,” Tony whistles, “impressive.”

Steve points at Tony, hint of humor in his face,“Genius, CEO, millionaire, philanthropist. More impressive.”

_____

Tony feels a weight roll off of his shoulders as soon as he enters the lab. This was where he belongs. Not in some bed like an invalid bonded to some random alpha even if is a nice alpha, or so he seems. Turning his head to face Steve, Tony breaks out into a smile. Steve is there looking around in wonder, honest to goodness slack-jawed wonder. 

“This is where the science happens,” Tony exclaims with jovial pride.

“Wow, Tony, I thought I had seen some far out there stuff, but this is, this is incredible,” Steve gushes smiling widely.

“Yeah, well, only the best for Stark Industries’ Golden Goose,” Tony smiles back.

“Golden Goose?” questions Steve, face frowning a little.

“Yeah, it is Obie’s nickname for me. You know like the fairy tale?”

“That’s horrible!” Steve exclaims.

“What? Why?”

Steve sounds a little sad in his response, “Tony they kill the goose to try and get the gold.” 

“No it isn’t. Jack gets the goose that lays golden eggs and it supports his family for life.” 

Now Steve just looks at him blankly, “That’s a hen.”

“Huh, well no one ever said Obie was up on his fairy tales,” Tony shrugs and launches into a light tour of the facilities. It is the same one he begrudgingly gives to investors but for some reason it does not seem like such a burden. Steve asks good questions and shows genuine interest. It is nice actually, to have someone interested in your work and not in what kind of profits your work can bring in. 

“So if you want to you can sit over there and I’ll get started. I have this crazy brilliant idea that I just have to get down.”

“Oh? What is it?”

“Okay, so I am going to call it Jericho. After the fall of, well, Jericho,” Tony pauses for effect, which must work because Steve looks captivated, “It can take down whole city walls, blockages, tunnels, or hill ranges, or whatever. You have a base launcher and from there it sends out 25 precision missiles that bomb in a straight line. It will raze anything in its path and it could change the way we do warfare. Imagine an enemy with nowhere to hide, no chance of getting away,” Steve’s face has fallen, he no longer looks on in amazement and is pale, “are you okay?” the question slips from Tony’s mouth. Crap did I trigger him?

It takes a moment, Steve seems to be wrestling with something but soon he speaks, “How can a weapon like that not harm civilians?”

Tony instantly responds, “It would be used only in war.”

“War has civilians and it seems like this weapon would be undiscerning in its devastation. City walls... Hill ranges… That is where people go to hide, and what if it gets in the wrong hands, city walls can lead to skylines.”

“Okay so one, bad people hide in hills too. Two -It would never fall into the wrong hands because it would only go from me- to Obie- to the Government. The idiots on the board don’t even get to see the blueprints. Also, you had to know I did this- I create weapons, that is what I do. It is what my Dad did and even though he was an asshole he helped us win WWII,” Tony stops to catch his breath, he has never had to justify himself like this before, “my Dad said the best weapons are ones you only have to use once. But he was wrong. The best weapons you don’t have to use at all. This weapon will be so terrifying that it will never have to be used.”

“If you make a weapon it will be used and for the record your Dad was wrong too. They used the A-bomb twice. Two times on two cities and two different civilian populations. That! Is how we won the war,” Steve’s voice breaks a little, “what happens when your weapon gets used and innocent people die? When something that you create is used for total destruction - Total War. How will you feel then?” 

Tony sits in shock. He almost feels like he has been slapped, “Steve, you’re a soldier, you risked your life, your friends risked their lives. This could make it so you wouldn’t have too. Drone warfare, bigger guns, modern technology can take the human loss out of war.”

“No they don’t. They just move the loss onto people we don’t see. I didn’t fight for that. I fought to stop the bullies and your solution sounds like the person with the biggest stick would just always get their way.”

“What do you think warfare is?” Tony counters.

Steve stops, he closes his eyes and breathes deeply, it takes him a full 3 minutes to speak, Tony knows because he counts the seconds, “Look, I am sorry, you just reminded me of this… person I knew of. We didn’t get along. He was trying to find the ultimate weapon. He didn’t care about civilians. He…was a really bad person and for a second there you reminded me of him and it shocked me. But I am sorry.” Steve halts his sentence and the end. 

“I don’t want to hurt civilians,” Tony’s voice is strained but purposeful.

“I know,” Steve reassures.

“This will help our soldiers,” Tony continues, needing to prove he isn’t some monster. 

“I know. Why don’t you get started on your work. I brought my sketch book we can stay as long as you need.” Steve moves to the only comfortable space in the workshop.

Tony tries not knowing what to say, “Steve...”

“Just-” a large sigh passes through Steve’s lips, “do your work. Tell me when you are ready to go.” 

They sit in cold silence for 8 hours.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony gets to know Steve a little bit more.

Chapter 10

Tony tries to get lost in his work, but every now and again he looks over at Steve, and is filled with a mixture of shame and then anger at feeling ashamed. After only 2 hours working on Jericho he switches tactics and looks on an energy project that has sat on his desk for months. It is supposed to be a project to quell the ‘hippies’ as Obie states but after looking at it for an hour Tony began to see some merit from an intellectual standpoint. Food appeared at one point and then the next thing he knew he hadn’t spoken to Steve in 8 hours. He also felt like total shit. Maybe he had pushed the recovery too much. 

He looks over at Steve who is hunched over his work at a side table near the entrance of the lab. Tony stretches starts to walk over. Steve quickly begins to pack up his work.

“I was worried you were going to work until midnight,” Steve said with an easy smile. 

Are we good? Just like that? Tony keeps the question to himself. “I figured I’d take it easy on you today. You seem tired.” Tony says aloud matching Steve’s smile, “how about Thai for dinner? I really want some Pad Thai.”

“Yes?” Steve responds back slightly confused, “I’m not really an adventurous eater.” 

Tony laughs, “Pad Thai isn’t adventurous, trust me. Think of it like noodles, fish sauce and eggs.” 

Steve face tinges green, at the suggestion of such a concoction of foods.

“It is honestly good,” Tony pushes on, “Wait until we go on a trip, I’m very much a when in Rome kind of guy. But if you want to get pizza?”

“Nope, noodles, fish sauce and eggs it is,” Steve puts on a determined face, “we can pick up some on the way home.” 

“Nah,” Tony takes out his phone and opens an app, “It is on it’s way, we need to hurry, I kind of got drunk and tipped 347% and now they deliver fast. I really want to just eat and sleep.”

“Whatever you want. How are you feeling besides hungry and tired?” Steve’s voice showing his honest concern.

“I’m great! Never better. Probably going to sleep 12 hours, but, “ Tony waves his hands, “whatever.”

“So long as you are sure.” Steve responds his brow creases slightly. 

He doesn’t believe me, which, okay yeah I’m lying but still. Tony turns and calls for the car. At least he doesn’t think I am a monster anymore… maybe. 

_____________________

They settle on the couch less than 30 mins later, their plates overflowing with food. Steve’s whole face was lit up with happiness as soon as he smelled the Pad Thai. Everyone loves Pad Thai, Tony thinks as Steve begins to hoover the food into his mouth. Good thing I ordered enough for four. 

“Shall we watch the news?” Steve asks.

“The news, like broadcast news? On the TV? Sure thing Gramps, guess we got to see what the weather will be like tomorrow. Perhaps figure out what the Kennedys are up to,” Tony quips.

Steve’s ears color red and he looks down clearly embarrassed, “We don’t have to.”

“No! No,” Tony quickly recovers, “I’d love to watch the news. I usually don’t I just normally YouTube it,” he scratches his head stumbling over his words, “I poke bears.” 

Steve’s eyes shot up in question. 

“I speak before I think, I bust balls, I kid, I joke, I anger others and I poke sleeping bears - metaphorically. So…” I can’t believe I am apologizing without being told to, “I’m sorry if I poke you too hard.”

Throughout the tiny speech Steve’s mouth twitches with amusement and by the time it is over he smile is wide and open, “Why do I get the feeling that hurt you?”

Tony laughs, “Come on, let’s support local journalists. Can you turn on the TV and find the local news JARVIS?” At his command the TV turns on and quickly switches through a few stations until it finds the local news. 

Steve practically jumps out of his socks. 

“You like it? It is a whole house system that I am working on. Suck it Alexa. This doesn’t have privacy concerns and I am trying to work with personality profiles. I was thinking snarky British? What do you think?” 

Steve looks around the room in awe, “I think you’re brilliant.”

Tony’s heart fills with pride and he sits to watch the local news, with his alpha like an octogenarian couple. 

____

Tony falls asleep on the couch after a long segment on municipal laws but wakes suddenly to the sound of sirens. The lights in the apartment are off and the lights from the emergency vehicles are the only things lighting the apartment. Steve was pacing behind the couch. The red and blue lights of the cop sirens splash across Steve’s scowling face. Steve is clearly agitated. 

Tony looks to the newscast and sees the bodega across the street. A car had jumped the curb and driven into the building. Several people were injured, but no fatalites so far. 

“Steve?” Tony questions the alpha. 

Steve turns quickly and stares down at Tony who freezes. Steve doesn’t look like the alpha he’d met a few days ago - he looks intense, like a soldier preparing for battle. His jaw is set, his hands are tight fists, his stance is rigid and his eyes are stern, almost cold. 

Their eyes lock and a few tense moment pass. Finally Steve speaks, “I wasn’t able to help.” His whole body is vibrating with energy. “There was an accident, I heard the crash, I felt the shake of the impact, and I wasn’t able to help.” His mouth hardly moves with each word, only enough to pronounce each word clearly. “I couldn’t leave you, and I could have helped, but I couldn’t put you through that. I couldn’t help.”

Tony looks back to the window where the lights were still illuminating the street. Tony stares at them letting the words absorb, adding it to the information he has gleaned about his alpha already.

The entity that is Steve Rogers is slowing becoming defined in Tony’s mind. Steve, a soldier, a government… person, someone who held his hand for hours so he wouldn’t be in pain, who fights but only if he thinks it is fair, and Steve who wants to go downstairs and help in a crisis.

Slowly Tony gets up and walks over to Steve, unsure of what to say it takes him a few moments of looking into the alpha’s eyes “Thank you, for-for staying.” Gingerly Tony places a hand on Steve’s chest, feeling the rapid heartbeat under his hand. “You’re a good person,” he says again before letting his arm drop to his side. “We can both go help?”

Steve leans towards Tony, blinking a few times, he deflates the tension flowing out of him, “I think they are just cleaning up.” He smirks, “Unless you want to grab a broom.”

Tony laughs, “I don’t even think I own one.”

“Let’s get you back to bed.” Steve places his hand on Tony’s shoulder and leads them both to the bed room.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony gets some unwanted news on Rhodes.

Chapter 11

Tony wakes in the middle of the night. 

Looking over to Steve’s sleeping form he turns onto his side and reaches for his phone. He begins to mindlessly scroll through different news and social media posts. Midway through his feed he sees the Rhodes has a post update. Rhodey never posts anything and Tony hesitates for a millisecond before clicking on it. 

The post is a picture of Rhodes with the omega he is seeing, both are smiling at the camera as she shows off a diamond engagement ring. Underneath the photo of the happy couple is a message, ‘She said yes!”.

Tony stares at the photo for a long time processing what he was seeing. His body reacts faster than his mind, his heart starts to race, and he suddenly feels very cold. His breathing is ragged eyes burning.

Well that’s it. Tony thinks, that’s all there is. Any dream or lingering feeling of hope that it would all work out was dying right now and god did it hurt. Tony began to feel the familiar pressure behind his eyes as he tries to stop his tears. He absolutely will not cry in front of Steve - even a sleeping Steve - because of Rhodes. To do so would be, in Tony’s mind, completely unacceptable. He temporarily considers leaving the room, seeing if he could stand the scent withdrawal. All he wants right now is to be alone and drink himself happy, but he can’t even do that. 

The pressure behind his eyes grows and soon he can’t hold it back anymore. The tears come and Tony sets his jaw to avoid inadvertently making a sound and alerting Steve his weeping. Tony breaths in as quietly as he can and tries to mentally ease that pain in his heart. It feels as though a dagger has been plunged into his rib cage. The pain only intensifies as Tony tries to control it. 

Then came a break in his perception - it was like he could see himself from across the room. There in a bed lay a stupid fucking omega, crying in bed next to his alpha, trying to hide his misery. No, no, no. Isn’t this just the situation he vowed that he would never be in. Lost, pathetic, heartbroken, wheezing and near hyperventilating from sorrow. He was Tony Fucking Stark. 

Stark men are made of iron. 

Steve shifts next him on the bed and Tony decides that he can’t risk staying here. He gets up to leave and starts to the door. Just as he is about to leave Steve speaks, “Please don’t go.” The request is simple but asks for so much. After he hears it Tony’s face crumbles into an expression of total agony. 

Tony’s resolve to hold back is now completely gone. His legs give out, and he wails.

Steve is immediately by his side, holding him close and stroking his side, the alpha was impossibly large and every bit of him was trying to surround Tony with comfort. 

They stay there on the floor until dawn. As the light of the sun comes in through the windows Tony feels his grief begin to lessen. He pulls away from Steve and stares into those blue eyes, searching for an answer. While he doesn’t find one, he does find strength there and he uses it to help himself up and walk over the bed. He gestures for Steve to join him. The alpha dutifully goes to his side of the bed. 

Tony reaches out his hand across the mattress, and Steve takes it in his own. 

“I think a day in bed.” Tony hoarsely suggests.

Steve sadly smiles back.


	12. Chapter 12

Tony’s legs can’t stop moving. He keeps shifting what side he is trying to sleep on. Steve lays on his side of the bed unmoving, and unintrusive. After an hour Tony lifts his head and looks at Steve stiff form. 

“It has been one hell of a week.” Tony starts. Steve’s eyebrows shoot up, which Tony takes as permission to continue. “I, um, just found out that my best friend is now engaged. And he didn’t even tell me that he was serious about this omega, and I know that me and him have grown apart recently. I just didn’t realize that we had grown this far apart and it hurts and sucks. With all of our stuff happening with our bond. Rhodes, my friend, who is now engaged, he didn’t even know about the bond status with you and me. I thought that me and him would bond. Me and Rhodes- bond. I thought he would wait,” Tony’s voice is still rough from crying. “I… I don’t know if you knew that. That I love- loved someone. But I was trying- for us, you and me. You saw me try with us but then with him going and getting engaged.” Tony takes a deep breath, “I guess you can say I broke a bit last night. I normally don’t cry. At all- ever.”

Steve sits up in bed and begins, “I got injured and was in a coma.” He pauses choosing his words, “It was bad and most people had written me off as dead. When I woke up, my omega, or at least the girl I wanted to be my omega had moved on and bonded with someone else. Had kids and everything. I woke him up three months ago. I cried a lot.” Steve takes a moment to collect himself, “Was kind of isolated, my best friend had died during the same mission. My parents died when I was young. I had nothing.” Steve turns to look out the window, “But I’m not the kind of guy who stays home. If I had nothing, then I had nothing to lose. I signed up for every mission they would put me on after that. I figured there were still bad guys out there. Within those three months I stopped three insurgent groups across the two nations, I went from the Arctic, to Afghanistan, Serbia, Japan and South Africa. On the week we met I changed time zones four times. I was bone tired the night we met and found out that I had one more mission before I could have a break.” Steve levels his eyes to Tony, “Some upstart had hacked my files and I was to confront and interrogate.” 

Tony’s eyes widen in fear.

“I was standing there in the shadow of your refrigerator and I could smell your scent. It was warm and lovely. It was the first time since I woke up where anything seemed familiar, then you collapsed,” Steve’s eyes start to water, “I was a wreck, just a shambling wreck. My foundation had taken so many hits that I was about to crumble. I had a mental break every day until you woke up and were out of the woods. Don’t apologize for having to break, or not being prepared for me to show up in your life, or loving someone. I’m a mess, I wasn’t prepared, I loved someone.” Steve is actively crying. 

Tony studies Steve with intensity. Gradually he reaches out and wipes Steve’s tears.

“Do we even have a shot?” Tony asks.

“Yeah,” Steve holds out his hand to Tony, who readily holds on, “We have a shot.”


	13. Chapter 13

After their latest intense conversation, Steve ushers Tony into the kitchen and begins to try and cook. 

“It is about 3, so what about lunch?” Steve asks, “I can make something?” He continues earnestly. 

Tony smiles as the sincerity, but then remembers the pancakes, “How about a sandwich? Nothing special- turkey?”

“Can do.” Steve turns around and begins to assemble ingredients. Tony meanwhile stares at Steve, his eyes unfocused and lost in thought.

He knows it will take a lot of effort to move past all of the baggage that both himself and Steve are bringing into this relationship. But for some reason - perhaps bonding hormones - he is optimistic. I mean, his alpha cried in front of him. Cried for him. That means something doesn’t it? Even if Tony doesn’t know what it means. But he can’t picture his father ever crying in front of his mother, or anyone. So it must mean something.

“What would you say for taking a walk around the city?” Steve asks as he places the sandwich in front of Tony, “I think it may be good to get out and get some fresh air. Just clear out the cobwebs.” 

“Absolutely,” Tony takes a big bite out of the sandwich and tries not to gag, for some reason Steve apparently thinks pickles belong on a sandwich. “How about a walk to my work. I can pick up a few things, I need a few things to make JARVIS a little more functional. Like, more personable, kind even.” 

“How do you do that?” Steve asks full of curiosity.

Tony grins from ear to ear and begins. Three hours later and the explanation is still going forward at a rapid pace, they eat, Steve cleans up, they walk both to and from Stark industries and then start looping the block over and over again. 

Steve seems to care what Tony says. Could that be true? He asks questions when he doesn’t understand and often rephrases what Tony just said to make sure he understood. It was fantastic - even Obie won’t listen to tech talk for over two hours.

After hour five something happens that has never happened before - Tony couldn’t talk tech anymore. He happily turns to Steve, “I can’t think of anything else right now. Unless you want to get crazy technical.”

Steve pauses in his steps, “Well we have been walking a bit, want to get some hot chocolate and then you can get as technical as you want. Just don’t expect me to be able to keep up.”

“Hot Chocolate, there is a place three blocks from here. They melt the chocolate in front of you. It’s the best!” 

“After you.” Steve waits politely as Tony begins to lead the way. 

“But what about you?” Tony asks, only now feeling the cold of night. “The fun stuff, not the tearjerker stuff?”

“Oh, um not much to tell, really.” Steve takes his time to gather his thoughts and then begins, “Only the fun stuff, okay, I um can’t cook but I can sew. I used to help my Mom mend clothes for some side money. You saw me trying to draw the other day when we were at the lab. I was sick as a kid and that is how I spent time in bed. I love cheeseburgers...” Steve voice drags, unable to think of much more. 

“I love cheeseburgers! Best toppings ever. GO” Tony calls out.

“Mustard?” Steve ventures with uncertainty.

“No way! Fried egg!” Tony guesses with enthusiasm. “ I had a burger once served with au jus. So fantastic.”

“None of that sounds real.” Steve deadpans.

“Oh it is real alright, and we are getting some tonight. Forget the hot chocolate. I think it is like 10 blocks…” Tony spins getting his bearings, “In that direction.” Tony points in another direction.

Steve laughs happily, “How about we get a cab. You look like you may be getting a little apple cheeked.” 

“Apple cheeked?!” Tony lets out a gleeful laugh, “That is perhaps the most winsome description anyone has said about my face. Ever.”

Steve turns away clearly embarrassed.

“Oh no you don’t.” Tony grabs Steve’s hands, “No getting embarrassed because you speak like a grandpa. It is adorable.” with his other hand Tony calls a nearby cab.   
When the cab pulled over Steve rushes to open our door and Tony scoots over and Steve follows. Somehow they never stop holding hands all the way to the restaurant.


	14. Chapter 14

The burger joint is decorated in farmhouse chic, complete with a steer head mounted to the wall and a floor covered with fake saw dust. 

“It is a little over the top,” Tony explains as they enter, “But it is good, I swear.” 

“I believe you,” Steve says staring up at the steer, “I just wouldn’t invite the decorator over.” 

Tony snorts a little before turning to the hostess, smile bright, “Two please.” 

“Welcome back Mr. Stark! Please come this way.” She says in a rush, grabbing two menus and waving them both to follow her. 

“This place also makes their own Tater Tots.” gushes Tony.

“Tator tot?” Steve raises an eyebrow in question.

“Yeah who knew those could be made without being frozen first.” the omega continues.

“Not much of a fan of frozen food myself.” Steve mumbles as he pulls out Tony’s chair. 

“Can you tell the waiter that we will have two of the Morning Burgers and two frozen hot chocolates?” Tony tells the hostess as he sits down. Yep, he was hungry. It was only afterward that he thinks that perhaps Steve will be angry, what with an omega ordering for their alpha. But Steve, is pretty damn awesome and seems unconcerned.

Once the alpha sits down at the table there is a short pause in conversation, Tony panics and blurts out what has to be the most inappropriate question to ever ask someone in public. “So what do I smell like?”

Steve’s eyes widen in shock and he quickly looks around. 

WellFuck, thinks Tony, Well, no point in half assing it.“I ask because I can’t smell myself, and no one ever seemed to care what I smelled like and I guess it was because I smelled bonded so that way only you could smell me properly.” Tony rails on somehow unable to stop. “So,because I don’t know what I smell like, although I guess I smell kind of like you, so leather. Well, not just any old leather, a special kind of leather. Howard had an old leather bomber jacket that belonged to Captain America back in the day and I always would sneak in and smell it because. Yeah just a weird kid, and, well, you know Captain America. Anyway. You smell like that, nice leather and something else, I don’t know what. Something... Really nice.”

Steve is very still and in a measured tone states, “I smell like Captain America.”

Tony laughs, “Well, at least like his jacket. So what do I smell like?”

“Electricity.” Steve states simply.

“You can’t smell that.” Tony is stumped, “Really what do I smell like?”

“Really, I was once on this mission that involved this really high powered, thing. Classified.” Steve shrugs in apology for not being able to explain it. “Anyway the energy from it seemed to crackle in the air. When I smelled it there was a primal reaction, the thing was powerful and you could smell that.”

“You think I’m powerful?”

“Well, at least I think you smell powerful.” Steve grins, proud of himself.

Tony opens his mouth to retort but by then the food is plopped in front of them.


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A surprise guest ruins the night

“So best burger ever?” Tony prods as they walk back to his apartment. 

“Pretty good.” Steve replies back with some cheek, knowing it would get reaction.

“Pretty good?” Tony repeats sounding slightly offended, “Only pretty good? What could possibly be better than this?”

“Burger King?” Steve deadpans.

“What!” Tony exclaims in disbelief.

“Hang on,” Steve opens the door to the apartment complex so Tony can walk in, “It was the first solid thing I was able to eat after I woke up.” 

“Well,” Tony smiles, as he walks over to the elevator, “I guess I can allow it. But only because you pulled at the heartstrings.”

“Your burger was a close second.” Steve adds as both walk into the elevator.

“Don’t patronize me.” Tony grumbles pressing the button to his apartment floor.

“Wouldn’t dream of it.” Steve says with a smile. 

The elevator doors close and for a brief moment Tony wants to lean over and kiss that Burger King loving fool on the mouth. But he pushes the thought aside, it's just a natural reaction to the alpha’s stupidly good looking face. Instead he reaches over and grabs Steve’s hand and gives it a squeeze. Steve brings their joined hands to his lips and kisses Tony’s hand. Tony tries so hard not to blush and lucky for him they arrive at the floor and Steve leads them out towards the apartment. 

Tony opens the door to his apartment, turns on the light and freezes. There in his apartment sat ‘eye patch’, his legs crossed, a folder in his hand and a look of impatience. 

“Welcome home,” eye patch drawls, “Have a good meal?”

“Director Fury,” Steve says in shock, “Is everything okay?”

“Well, you to tell me.” Fury states. “How is testing the bond? Any progress on duration before scent withdrawal.” 

“We are working on it.” Steve says an odd edge to his voice. 

Tony turns to him in shock but keeps his face neutral. They haven't been testing it, not at all. Were they supposed to be testing it? Tony’s mind runs through the past couple of days but doesn’t seem to recall.

“Are you now?” Fury retorts voice suspicious. He throws the folder down on the modern coffee table, photos spill out on the surface. Hundreds of shots over the past few days, all hours of the day; all of them showing clearly the two of them the same room as each other. Tony stares at the photos, a few where taken through his bedroom window, one shows a distraught Steve holding onto an unconscious Tony, it must have been taken right after they met, one showed Tony crying over Rhodes. Tony starts to sort through them, some are taken in Stark SI, how did these come to be? Some of them showed them both happy; eating burgers, just an hour ago. 

“What is this?” Tony says accusingly, “Are you following us?”

“No, but the counter intelligence agent we just grabbed has been.” Fury drawls, “We picked him up less than five minsutes ago. Seems you two have a following.”

Tony turns to look at Steve whose face in pinched in worry and then back at Fury. “Why? Is it Stark Tech or is Steve really that big of a deal?”

“We can work on the bond.” Steve tells Fury. 

“Good. My security can only do so much with you two out in the open like this.” Fury says back, as though Tony doesn’t exist. 

“I understand.” Steve’s reply is grim.

Fury stands up and starts towards the door, “And yes Stark, Steve is a very big deal.”


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

Silence fills the room, Tony swears he can hear his own heart thumping. 

From the corner of his eye he studies Steve’s face. The alpha’s brow is a mess of hard lines, his jaw is set and he his eyes have an unsettling intensity about them, obviously Fury had hit a nerve. 

Tony opens his mouth but finds nothing comes out of it, so instead he places his hand comfortingly on Steve’s shoulder. 

The alpha turns to him and his features soften. “We have to work on the bond.” Steve sadly mumbles, “I should have insisted before but I didn’t want to hurt you.” 

Tony rolls his eyes, “You could have insisted all you want. If I didn’t want to it wouldn’t have happened.” he then freezes a little, Did I go to far?

Steve however seems more exasperated than angry. “Tony, this is serious.”

“But why is it happening? Like, your a soldier, what did you do kill a tyrant?” Tony presses.

“Tony I really can’t talk about it.” Steve walks away from Tony’s side and for some reason Tony has to fight the instinct to reach out and grab his hands, “We have to try to test the bond.”

Startled Tony sputters “What like right now? Like now - now?”

“Tony I’m sorry but those photos mean you are in danger just being around me. We have to be able to separate so I can go out and find those people and stop them.” Steve emphasizes the last part of his sentence. 

To Tony it almost sounds like a growl. Tony takes a step back before he can stop himself. “Stop them how? Who are you? Like what even is this? People are taking photos of us, creepy photos. I’ve dealt with paparazzi before, this isn’t that. This is some spy shit. What is going on?” The omega’s voice raises as he goes on, his voice growing more panicked. 

“All the more reason to test the bond.” Steve reasons, his voice is now level and calm. 

“No.” The omega stands up straight adding as much to his height as possible, “All the more reason for you to tell me what is going on.” 

“You will be in more danger if you know.” The alpha does not posture or try in any way to intimidate Tony. “I said I wouldn’t lie to you again.”

Tony shakes his head, “This is bullshit. You know this is bullshit. “

Steve leaves the room to go into the kitchen and Tony tries to follow. “No Tony, you stay here. We will try to see how long you can last and then call it a night.”

“Fuck you!” Tony in his anger turns and leaves through the front door. If I am going to hurt then it will be on my terms. 

“Tony!” Steve rushes out the door behind him.

“No, you want to test the bond. Then let’s test the bond.” Tony’s anger is near uncontrollable right now. He can feel the heat rise to his face and he runs to the stairs. But Steve somehow moves fast, really really fast and blocks him.

“Tony please, I can see you are upset, we can wait until tomorrow if that makes you feel any better about this. I’m sorry.” Steve’s voice is still even, kind, warm and it infuriates Tony to no end.

“You want to get away from me, then fine, get away from me!” Tony yells.

Steve holds up both hands and take a giant step back. “Tony, please, I’m sorry let’s both go back into the apartment and talk.”

Tony shakes his head and pushes open the door, “You only want to talk so you can get what you want.” Tony crosses the threshold and starts down the stairs, “Don’t follow me!” Tony races down the stairs as quickly as he can. His breath becomes ragged, he his panting by the time he gets to the ground floor and has to pause. His heart is racing and his head is swimming and then it happens. 

The arctic air begins to fill his lungs, sharp, stinging and painful. His panting breaths become ragged, the pain of the air starts in his lungs and then begins to spread to the rest of his body. He screams. 

Immediately Steve is there. Engulfing him in his scent. But how? Steve didn’t leave follow him down the stairs. How was he here so fast?

Rather than accepting the comfort Tony tries with all his might to push Steve away. But Steve is a solid wall, unmoving, and unyielding. “Let me go!” Tony all but screams. A direct order that Steve obeys instantly. 

Tony slumps against a nearby concrete wall, exhausted, he breathes deeply, letting his anger flow away with each breath. It takes him about five minutes to gather himself. “Tomorrow, we try again.” He says flatly.

Steve shakes his head slowly in agreement.


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Man, I suck at making decent size chapters- sorry all around.

Chapter 17

Tony’s bed seems bigger than normal. Steve has managed to push himself all the way over on the opposite side of the bed, laying on his side, facing away from Tony. While Steve had never imposed upon Tony’s space, he was always a presence in the bed. Hell, he was too big not to take up half the bed, but right now Tony feels that he was completely alone. 

Tony’s fingers itched to trace Steve’s spine, touch a shoulder or pass his fingers through that blond hair. I’m being ridiculous right now. I should still be pissed, not wanting to comfort this asshole. But I do. Is it bonding hormones? Stockholm? 

Tony closes his eyes and tries, really tries to will away the desire, but it is of no use. I’ve never been good at turning away from temptation. He reaches out to Steve’s back and stops millimeters from the flesh. Tony’s holds his breath, taking in the possible action and all the ways it could change everything. Then, with all his courage, he closes the distances with his hand. 

Steve’s muscles tense under the omega’s touch but then gradually he relaxes. He turns around and Tony is surprised to see his eyes wet from unshed tears. “I’m sorry Tony. I really am, I wish I could tell you everything. I wish I could tell you about me.” 

“Can you even tell me why?” Tony pleads.

“No. Not beyond what I have already told you.” Steve reasons sadly.

“Mortal danger and all that.” Tony deadpans.

“Yeah.” Steve replies he then starts to turn back around but is stopped by Tony’s hand on his arm. Tony moves closer to Steve and curls next to him, offering as much comfort as he could. “Tony” Steve whispers in awe.

“Don’t expect this every fight.” Tony mumbles into Steve’s chest. “In fact next fight you can forget this ever happened, that is how impossible this is as repeating occurrence.”

Steve wraps his large arms around Tony holding him gently. “Understood.” Steve whispers into Tony’s hair and forehead.


	18. Chapter 18

“Okay,” Tony stands up from the kitchen table after morning coffee, “Before you try to cook again, let’s get this over. Otherwise I won’t have any appetite.”  
Steve stares at him in surprise. “Right now?”

“Yes, dear - now” Tony says with all the confidence he frankly does not have. He goes into the bedroom and grabs one of Steve’s old shirts and holds it up to his nose. “Now scat, and maybe go to the bodega and get some breakfast burritos. Not that I don’t like your cooking but I can’t stomach it for more than one meal a day.” Tony gives his best charming smile. 

“I’ll be right outside the door.” Steve responds, “I was thinking waffles, but maybe we can grubhub some?” 

“Sounds great, you order from the hallway.” Tony answers back. “What is our goal? Five minutes? Fifteen? Twenty?” 

Steve shakes his head, “No goals right now, just call me when you need me.” 

“Perfect, my own personal goal then.” Tony smiles brightly, pushing Steve towards the door. “Now shoo, I wanna see how this goes when I have the shirt.” 

Steve gives him one more parting glance before shutting the door.

Tony braces himself, feet spread apart as though waiting for a physical blow. He breathes in deeply, inhaling the scent on the shirt. Then, slowly he begins to count. Which is boring as all hell, so his mind drifts, he begins to think about his latest idea regarding energy. His blueprints were at work but he closes his eyes and tries to visualize the schematics. 

He is trying to account for runoff when he begins to feel a slight burn of icy air in his lungs. Calmly he moves the shirt in his hand, so that he is able to inhale a fresh bit of scent. 

Less time passes and the icy feeling begin again. But it is manageable, no need to yell for help yet. He moves the shirt around again and tries to visualize but cannot. He is becoming hyper aware of his body now. Every breath starts to become labored. He is huffing the shirt like it necessary for survival, it certainly feels like it is. 

Tony backs up and sits down in a chair as he begins to hyperventilate, desperately breathing in to stop the ice from stabbing at his lungs. He looks at the clock over the stove top. It had been less than four minutes. He could make it to five. He knew he could. Just calm down. He thinks. Just calm. Calm. Calm. Calm. 

“Tony?” Steve questions from the outside hallway. 

Tony shakes his head in response refusing to give up and call for help, but also completely unable to open his mouth to respond with assurances. 

“Tony?” the voice calls again with more concern showing through.

Tony grunts in return as spots begin to form in front of him. He looks over at the clock 4 mins 10 seconds…

A full arctic blast shreds his lungs and he heaves in pain and everything turns black. He hears rather than sees the door open and the sound of quick steps. Soon the air warms and he is able to see again. He looks over at the clock - 4 mins and 50 secs. 

Well Shit.


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19

“Why didn’t you just call me in?” Steve presses after Tony is fully recovered. Tony had woken up several minutes ago cradled to Steve’s chest and covered in blankets. Steve had been shaking and rubbing Tony’s cheeks softly all while whispering Tony’s name over and over. It was a nice thing to wake up to. 

Presently, Tony peers out from his cocoon of blankets that Steve had piled on top of him. He holds an herbal tea with moderate disdain, Steve had insisted that he sip it. Where had Steve even found something caffeine free in the household? “Had I known how much you would overreact I might of.” Tony replies with a smirk.

Steve shakes his head in frustration and begins to walk the room, “Please don’t make this a joke Tony.”

“Okay.” Tony throws off the three blankets and tries to disentangle himself from the last. “But if it does happen again could you kindly not overreact.” 

“It won’t happen again. Not like that.” Steve says sternly, his eyes flashing with intensity. 

Tony smiles widely, “Sir, yes sir.”

“Tony...” Steve warns, but his stance relaxes. 

Good, Tony thinks as tension eases out of Steve. The omega takes in a large breath and continues, “Steve what do you expect?” Tony flings the last blanket on the floor. “This is going to hurt, the harder I push the faster the results. The sooner you can go after… Secret shit and the sooner I can go back to work.”

“You can go to work now. We can go to the labs today.” Steve waves his hand towards the door in dismissal.

“Oh can I? How nice. I mean work- work. Three am coffee runs, chinese take out for breakfast. Sleeping on a desk and only waking up when your chair spins away. Work.” Tony stresses. 

“That sounds horrible.” Steve counters.

“No, it is the best, it is my life and I love it. And I want to work.” Tony continues timidly, “You said I could work.”

“Of course you can work..” Steve assures, “That doesn’t sound healthy but you can work. But we can slow down. Call me crazy - I just don’t like seeing you black out in pain.” 

“Okay,” Tony relents, “I will call you next time before I black out. But I’m keeping the snark. It is the best part of my personality. The glue that makes this,” Tony gestures to his head, “work.” 

Steve looks at Tony with gentle eyes. “Sounds good. Do you want to go to the lab?” 

“What no! We have to handle this. Round two ready to go.” Tony places his cup on the table and rubs his hands together. 

“Already?” Steve sputters, but he looks more impressed than angry. 

“Yep.” Tony pops the P.

“Ok, I’ll trust you. Round two. Don’t wait until you faint.” Steve adds.

“Whoa, I didn’t faint.” Tony answers back as he pushes Steve out of the door. “I heroically took an unexpected nap.” He closes the door to the sound of Steve’s laughter. It was a good sound.

_______

Six hours later and Tony is only able to make it to 6 minutes without Steve by his side. But as Steve points out it is longer than the start of the day.

They sit around the kitchen table that evening, Tony eyeing the dinner Steve had just made. The questions running through his mind were endless, Why did he use ketchup as a base for spaghetti sauce? What makes pasta clump like this? Did Steve not stir the pasta even once? Can I eat this? 

Tony looks down at his plate, it seems impossibly full. Every bite he takes is an act of will. Steve is happily babbling on about how tenacious Tony is, how brave. Normally the alpha was sedate in his gensures, they were deliberate and careful, but now he is waving his hands around in emphasis, touching Tony’s shoulder, his head, the back of his neck. Everytime Steve makes contact Tony felt warmth in the pit of his stomach. 

The alpha gets up and helped himself to more of the inedible pasta. The omega’s eyes fall on Steve’s perfect ass, his face warms and he gets up to follows behind Steve. Going onto his tiptoes Tony hugs Steve from behind and kisses the back of his neck.

Steve sucks in air in shock and then whispers, Tony’s name so softly it was barely heard. He turns to face the omega who smiles widely.

“Why don’t we go to bed and celebrate my success and tenacity.” Tony says with a sly smile and a raised eyebrow.


	20. Chapter 20

Tony leads Steve by the hand, a happy leer on his face. He reaches the end of the hall in front of the bedroom and turns back to kiss Steve sweetly. His hand moves to that chiseled jaw. Then travels up to that lustrous golden hair. Yet soon Tony tires of sweetness and begins to deepen the kiss. The omega grabs on to the hair to steady himself as he began to get lost in the feeling of heat pulling at his gut. 

Steve for his part was kissing back in earnest almost trying to keep up with Tony’s movements. A few wondrous moments pass until Tony pulls away to fiddle with the door knob.

“A-Are you sure?” Steve studders. His hair is a mess; his lips red and his face flushed. You are so fucking cute and handsome. Tony thinks with a sudder. 

Tony laughs in joy, “We can slow it down if you want. But I really want to see you naked. I’ve never been one for temptation. Why fight it when you can just give in?” He takes Steve’s hand and turns towards the bed pulling him along with impatience. 

But Steve pauses in the door frame refusing to go forward. “Is that what this is? Just because you are presently enamoured?” 

Tony stops trying to move the large man and looks at him with amusement “Presently enamoured? You mean horny? Yeah, you’re gorgeous, and I’m a wet dream, perfect match. Let’s do this.”

Steve doesn’t seem to like the joke. His face sours and he takes his hand back from Tony. A coldness fills the room. “Oh.” The alpha doesn’t move.

“What’s going on? We are bonded, we are stuck with each other for life, why delay the fun stuff?” Tony presses while pulling on his belt suggestively trying to lighten the mood and bring them back to happy and amourous. 

Confliction runs across Steve’s face for a moment. Then his eyes harden as a decision is made. “I would like it to mean something more than that.” Steve counters with an air of sadness. 

Well that is a boner killer. Tony feels suddenly deflated. He removes his hand from his belt suddenly feeling foolish. Fucking hell.

“I just really want this to be the best it can be and I think that rushing.” Steve sighs, “I want to,” He gestures toward the bed. “So much and time is so fickle and can run out but I want it to mean something and if it doesn’t mean anything right now then I don’t want to make love.”

Tony stares at Steve in derision, “I hate that phrase. It isn’t making love, that is some alpha propaganda bullshit.” He breathes in filling this lungs as though ready to yell but in the end just breathes it out steadily, “Omega’s don’t get love, we get orders and restrictions. But fine whatever. Just thought we could celebrate.”

Steve looks at his feet. “It won’t be that way for us. I get that it seems odd. But I don’t want… We don’t have to be stuck together...” Steve starts to nervously rub the back of his neck. “Maybe I am too old fashioned. Maybe I don’t understand what is expected now. I was always told that arranged bond was something that could never happen to me. And I saw all the picture shows where couples just had love and maybe I’m just naive. But I think you are just spectacular. But I just don’t think that physical elements, even ones so wanted, should go before emotional. Perhaps we need to know each other more?”

Tony shakes his head, there is a lot to unpack in that sermon but it is not worth the effort and he dismisses the whole thing as alpha foolishness. Time to lay down some truths. “What do you think love is?” Tony starts.

“Love?” Steve questions, obviously he did expect the conversation to take this turn, “Um, it is a strong connect between two persons where they respect, care for and nurture each other.”

Tony nods, that was mostly the bullshit he expects from an alpha, “I had that once. That fluffy stuff. It fell apart. Because in truth love is an act of will, it is a daily effort and a relentless burden. And if you don’t treat it that way you lose it. I lost it. I had it and I didn’t work at it and I lost it. Or I never had a chance. I don’t know.” He takes a moment to center his thoughts, “You’re going to hear a story now. No one else gets to ever hear this story- understood?”

“Of course.” Steve assures Tony. 

“Sit down.” Tony gestures to the chair near the bed. The same one that Steve had sat in for days waiting for Tony to wake up, ready to be at his beck and call should he need it. 

Steve sits leaning forward and waits as Tony composes himself. 

“My mom.” Tony pauses, looking into the distance, “My mother… Howard and me didn’t get along. At all. He was vindictive, cruel and had a vicious streak, especially when he drank. Which was always. Constantly in the end. There was no surprise that he drove into that tree. He probably couldn’t even hold the wheel.” 

Tony take a deep breath in and slowly pushes it out, “But this happened before it had gotten really bad. It was New Years Eve, and I was 10 and I had been allowed to join in the grand ball they threw every year. I had the time of my life, I think they had expected me to fall asleep at some point but I was so wired that I couldn’t calm down enough to stop dancing and talking.

 

“In the limo on the way home I just kept asking questions about everything I had just seen. At the time I was fascinated by what it meant to be an omega. I asked about everything from famous omega scientists, authors, engineers, and that night I had met the three omega employees of Stark Industries. I was giddy and kept asking Howard about their research. After like 20 minutes of this he just yells, ‘Jesus Christ I don’t know what those O’s do, it isn’t the important shit I can tell you that.’ My mom tried to put her hand on his to calm him down but all he did was shake it off and pour himself a glass of scotch and drains it. By the time we reach the manor he has had three more. I have no idea how much he drank earlier in the evening. 

“When we entered through the foyer of the homestead Howard started to head to the study where his private stock was. My mom, correctly and gently, suggested that he had had enough. At the time I remember him walking funny, with his hand on the walls. Like he needed to steady himself or he would fall. The man was close to drinking himself into an early grave. She was so kind in her reasoning, not judgemental, not harping at all but firm. She was factual in a way my fath- Howard usually respected.” Tony had to shift but continued.

“But Howard didn’t listen and continued to the study, he kept pausing in his steps to right himself and get to the study and she followed him the entire time, ready to catch him should he fall. She was so preoccupied that she didn’t see me following. By the time Howard reached the drink cart in the study he was beyond comprehension.” 

“He picked up a bottle and glass and my Mom, all she did was put a hand on his shoulder and he backhanded her with all his strength. It was so hard that she fell backwards and hit her head on the nearby wall. I ran to her to help her up and he, he just poured himself another drink and slumped away to their bedroom. It was the first time I had witnessed him abuse my mom.”

“After that it was like a blindness had been cured. I saw the bruises in the morning, the subtle threats, and the belittling comments to her sex, her ideas, and her intelligence. It was horrible, and it was like the knowledge that it happened at all made the actions steep from her to me. Soon I was punished for small transgressions. Vague infractions that could encompass so much, like ‘not knowing my place’ that was a big one.”

“So this continues for years and at 13 I ask my Mom why she puts up with this. This pain, this abuse, and she looks at me and says, ‘For omegas love is not an emotion, it is an obligation, and an act of pure will.’ We never talked about it again.” Tony collects himself for a moment. Holding up his hand to signal to Steve that he wasn’t done. At some point the omega’s eyes fell to the floor and they couldn’t seem to move.

“Then I fell in fluffy love, the kind with repsect, and care and I still end up on the floor crying. Because of a lack of will. You may think it is all goodness and support, but it isn’t, it is heartache and pain, it is humiliation and a loss of self. Truthfully, I would much rather have a deal. Like the one we already reached in the contract. Sex would be a happy bonus to that contract but not if it comes with the strings of ‘love’ attached.” Tony takes a moment and looks up at Steve.

Steve sits ramrod straight his face is emotionless and his hands are gripping the arms of his chair. Steve slowly and carefully moves his hands to his lap. Tony notices that the chair seems misshapen under the fabric where Steve’s hands had held onto it. 

Steve opens his mouth to speak, his tone sterile, lacking any emotion, “Thank you for sharing that. You have my word no one else will ever hear about it. I know how hard it is to share such stories. My father died in the Service, but before he left to serve there wasn’t a day that went by where he didn’t leave a mark on my mom or me. I’ll leave it at that.” Steve’s voice breaks a little emotion finding its way through. “Love. Love is what I want for us. It isn’t horrible. What our fathers did wasn’t love. Love is more than a forced actions. It is a gift.”

Tony shrugs unconvinced. 

That night in bed Tony swears that Steve is holding his hand tighter than normal. Not uncomfortable, just securly, like he wants to make sure it doesn’t slip away.


End file.
